Feel “I am”

What the Method Is

The core instruction of this meditation method is to “be aware you are and discover the ever-living”. This technique, also known as “Self-remembering,” is fundamentally about cultivating a continuous, non-verbal awareness of one’s own being or “am-ness,” rather than identifying with thoughts, actions, or external attributes. It is considered one of the most potent techniques, utilized by many great masters, including Buddha, Mahavira, Jesus, and Gurdjieff.

How It Is Done

To practise “Feel ‘I am’,” one must integrate this awareness into their daily existence:

  • Cultivate Continuous Self-Remembering: The primary step involves remembering that “you are” at all times, throughout various activities such as singing, seeing, tasting, eating, walking, or bathing. This practice is explicitly not a verbal repetition of “I am” or any mantra, but rather a profound, non-conceptual feeling or sensitivity to one’s pure existence. For instance, when touching someone’s hand, one should focus not only on the external sensation but also on one’s own presence behind that touch.
  • Release External Identifications: The aim is to disassociate this “I am” from any given names, family, religion, country, or other societal labels. The goal is to simply experience “am-ness” or “existence” devoid of specific form or name (nirakar, anam).
  • Become the Witness: The method encourages being fully present in the current moment, entirely absorbed in the ongoing activity, without the mind drifting into thoughts of the past or future. This involves maintaining an awareness of one’s inner centre even as the senses engage with external objects. For example, when observing something, consciously be aware that you are the observer positioned behind your eyes, much like looking through a window.
  • Persevere with Non-Interference: This is a challenging practice requiring consistent effort, as the mind naturally tends to wander and forget. The practitioner should not yield to frustration but simply return to the feeling of “I am” whenever recollection arises. It is crucial not to force or artificially cultivate stillness, but rather to remain authentically present with one’s current state without creating additional mental problems.
Commentaries and Insights
  • The Mind as an Illusionary Veil: Osho explains that the mind constantly projects outwards, forming identifications with external objects, concepts, and past experiences. This identification with the mind, which is essentially an accumulation of words and thoughts, is pinpointed as the root of all suffering and the creation of a false self. “Feel ‘I am’” serves to dismantle this identification, offering a glimpse of one’s true being, which exists beyond the confines of the mind.
  • Unveiling the Authentic Self: When one successfully transcends the mind and becomes aware of the pure self, this awareness is described as pure, unconditioned, and timeless. This authentic self is referred to as “ever-living”, and characterized as “formless” and “nameless” (nirakar, anam). It is not an attainment that must be achieved in the future, but rather a discovery of an inherent truth that is already present. The sensation of “am-ness” leads to a feeling of lightness and weightlessness, facilitating a shift from the false centre to the authentic one.
  • Connections to Other Esoteric Traditions: This technique shares deep resonance with several spiritual paths:
    • Gurdjieff’s Self-Remembering: The entirety of Gurdjieff’s system is rooted in this single sutra, emphasizing the continuous practice of self-remembering.
    • Raman Maharshi’s “Who Am I?”: This inquiry is presented as a parallel, albeit more intellectual, method that ultimately culminates in the dissolution of the ego and the realization of “I am no more!” or “nothingness” (shunya).
    • Zen Buddhism: Similar principles are found in Zen, where masters encourage simply performing everyday actions, such as eating or sleeping, with full presence, thereby living as a “buddha-mind”. The awakened state (buddha-mind) is characterized by the cessation of inner dreaming and the emergence of pure, empty space.
  • Transcending Duality and Conflict: By accepting one’s present state and observing it without judgment, the practitioner moves beyond internal conflict and dualities. This leads to a state of profound ease, where all aspects of existence, regardless of their nature, become sacred and beautiful.
  • Transformation of Perception: As the individual’s inner reality becomes more profound through “I am” remembering, the external world may begin to appear less real, akin to a dream. This signifies a shift in perception, where the self is recognized as the fundamental reality, and external existence is viewed as a relative phenomenon, or “psychodrama”.
  • Potential Obstacles and Precautions:
    • Fear of Annihilation: The journey inward can be daunting, as it often involves the dissolution of the ego, which may trigger a deep-seated fear of “not being” or “spiritual death”.
    • Mental Deception: The mind possesses a cunning ability to intellectualise the experience or to simulate false sensations of “I am,” mistaking mere verbal repetition for genuine experience. It may also dismiss genuinely simple methods as ineffective or inadequate.
    • Nature of Enlightenment: While the preparatory stages for awareness can be gradual, the ultimate experience of “am-ness” or enlightenment is a sudden, non-causal event. Any progressive clarity experienced during practice is merely a sign of diminishing inner “disease,” not the final, absolute state itself.
    • The Role of a Master: Although the technique can be practised independently, profound transformation is often facilitated by the guidance of a living master. Such a master can offer individualized initiation and assist in overcoming deeply ingrained inner barriers and deceptions, by helping the seeker become “totally naked” of all hidden aspects.